Nordic Joe's Seattle Snorkel Guide

Date:  10/4/08

Temperature: ~80 Degrees

Water Temperatre: 48 Degrees

Surface: Calm.

No suit.  Just a bathing Suit, Fins, Snorkel and Mask.

Going in, I was very mindful of the gawking teens and children.  Some were pointing and laughing.  I knew that it was going to be cold, but I needed to guage just HOW cold and if a wetsuit was just needed for comfort of if hypthermia would set in right away.  How could I tell people what to wear without trying ALL the options?   Plus, I didn’t own a wetsuit or know where to get one, so this was the only way I was going to get salty.

I waded in and was met with the biting cold I had been accustomed to through my earlier involuntary explorations.  As the water passed my hips I felt a sense of doom that I could not explain.  I surpressed this childish emotion and gritted my teeth even as I fitted the mask to my head.  I plunged down quickly to get it over with and let the water wash the day’s excess heat away.  It felt good as I lay there.  So good, that I began to think that there was nothing to this “you need a wetsuit” business other than some people’s aversion to the sensation of cold water.  I feel the same way about hot weather.  I wish there was a cold suit for those days.

I began to paddle forward and was struck by a full-body ice-cream headache.  I gasped and stood up while wrenching the mask from my face.

W T F?

My reaction was visceral and instant.  My body didn’t like what had just happened at all.  I monitored myself for the signs of hypthermia.  None yet.  I had not begun shivering…my extremities were bright red, not blue…so I tried again.  It was like swimming through knives, but this time I was prepared.  I had a hard time breathing, and had to force each breath to come in and out as I paddled out.  My legs began moving more and more slowly when a pain radiated from my neck to my head that was again, quite like that intense pain one gets when eating ice cream to fast, but only most of my upper body was experiencing it.

I stood up and the pain still did not pass.  My body, against my firm instructions to wait for signs of hypthermia, began pacing for the shore.  Soon I was standing in the sun and felt every bit like a shining ice-cycle through which the light just passed without imparting an ounce of warmth or energy.  I never got to shivering, but I didn’t have to.  Swimming in the sound without a wet suit was suicide.

As I dragged my gear slowly to the fresh-water shower to rinse it off before stowing it away, I was yet again aware of staring and laughing youths.  It felt like a march of shame and I was confused by that.  I didn’t think it was all that funny.  Then when I got to the showers, I realized why everyone had been pointing and laughing.  That sinking dread as my hips submerged was explained: The conspicuous outline of my expensive smart phone was clearly visible in the pocket of my swim trunks.  The sound had gotten it’s second cell phone from me!

The price of wisdom is paid in cell phones.

I went home and started making calls to see what I could fenagle for a wetsuit.  Winter approached, but I would be back – rain or shine.